Wednesday, February 5, 2014

The Animal Instinct

It's been one of those days... no, it's been one of those weeks... wait, it's been one of those months!
Stressed beyond most limits of stress, due to work, change, finances, weather, family, future, career, what everyone will think of me...

It's been one of those months.

I was on my way to teach meditation, cranky due to being dehydrated the day before due to subtle food poisoning, not to mention a tough day at work, when I realized do I really want to teach meditation being cranky deep down inside? I realized the yoga class before that might settle my mood. I needed it. Then again driving home in the snow storm which was supposed to hit around 8 pm, (when I would leave meditation class), came into mind and annoyed me further. As I was driving, ignoring the traffic, going with the flow, singing the songs, a song's lyrics specifically caught my attention.

It was The Animal Instinct"  by The Cranberries.

The lyrics went something like this: Suddenly something has happened to me, as I was having my cup of tea.
Suddenly i was feeling depressed, I was utterly and totally stressed.
Do you know you make me cry?
Do you know you make me die?
And the thing that gets to me, is you'll never really see,
And the thing that freaks me out, is I'll always be in doubt.
It is a lovely thing that we have, it is a lovely thing that we,
It is a lovely thing, the animal, the animal instinct.

So take my hands and come to me, we will change reality.
So take my hands and we will pray, they won't take you away.
They will never make me cry, no,
They will never make me die.
And the thing that gets to me, is you'll never really see,
And the thing that freaks me out, is I'll always be in doubt.

The animal, the animal, the animal instinct in me,
It's the animal, the animal, the animal instinct in me...

This song woke me up from this frustrated anger, annoyance and crankiness I was holding onto.
This is why we meditate, to rid ourselves of these basal instincts, our primordial instincts... that of an animal. So although this animal instinct in me, is a survival instinct, does it serve me now?
Our fright, flight and fight responses are useful, but did I need to be stressed and let it out right now?

I thought about it all, how I let myself get stressed by not being present. How I let myself be irritable and angry because of lack of sleep... I let it all get to me. I can manage this, but I wasn't being present, I was irate due to lack of sleep, but I missing my energy now, because I was upset about the night before.
The song helped me let out some steam, and get into a meditative state. It was great to enter yoga more positive. I was going to narrate this during meditation class, but sadly students got scared of the snow storm.

OM

Breathe





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