The Fountain Pen: Art of Writing

My friend Tanjot asked about fountain pens the other day. I hadn't written with mine in a long time. I remember doing a lot of research before buying mine. I missed the fancy Pelikan (German) pen my father had gotten me when i was in 5th grade, and had just begun cursive or as we called it "joint-handwriting". The letters were all joined, thus the name, we never knew of cursive until moving here.

Tanjot posted a picture of his handwriting with his new-old pen. It was old because it was his grandfathers, how romantic is that! Most people use micro-tip, or ball point pens, so it was awesome to see another fountain pen fanatic, of course the story behind his pen is amazing.

My current fountain pen has no amazing story. The amazing pens I did have are all long gone, ie. the Parker pen which my dad let me have, after he had it since he was at Case, the Pelikan pen, and many others. By 12th grade I had over 10 amazing fountain pens. Anyway, enough mourning  over the loss of my material obsession, now I have one Sheaffer fountain pen. It writes smooth. Anyway I had filled it up a few days ago for no apparent reason, and today I began to write with it, so I could post it on Facebook, like Tanjot had, and realized it was tough. 

It had been a year since I had last written with it. My handwriting was all over the place. I really had to focus. I was having a hard time flowing with the ink, I was hesitating before my 'L's. I wanted to get this post done, so I focused and ended up writing three pages of  a quote from Buddha. That's when it struck me.

This is art. This is meditation. Why was writing so tough? Why was I hesitating on certain words? It was amazing to introspect, and such a similar process to meditation. I found out things about myself, and worked through it until my 'L's were smoother. I learned to "let go" in a way, and go with the flow.

There is a value in arts and culture. It is what we fight for. Art and culture is what we cultivate within when we have peace, freedom and time. Which is all the time, and a state of mind. I know there's a push to get cursive writing out of school, but it's such a skill, a learning in patience, introspection, control, and going with the flow (being present). Why would we take away this amazing experience from our children, just because lost our sight of creativity, art, and began valuing/ focusing on other things?

As much as we like the big hullabaloo of a big success, wealth and riches, we always realize that the joys are in family, friends and the little things in life. We get sucked in, and sometimes we're sucked into a tornado of life, that we forget the things that matter. Stop and smell the roses, write with a fountain pen, take some time to meditate, go for a walk in the park, life's too short to miss these things.


Breathe 

Stressful day? ... Meditate!

I was having a super stressful week, forget the day... and today was the epitome of it all. I wanted to scream, cry, or punch someone (sometimes this is when those video games come in handy). I have been reading the Mahabharata (Devdutt Patniak's version, if you are curious), and I remembered Krishna's words "anger multiplies, but calmness divides.

Instead of feeding my rage, letting it all get the better of me, I took a few minutes and closed my eyes and breathed. I meditated focusing on positivity which people were sending me. That's what friends are for. I then had the strength to focus and feel the positivity within me; even in the darkest times it is there, only you can let it diminish, or shine. I let the positivity fill me up like a glowing light from within, and showering on me from without.

I focused on breathing, and light, and suddenly I felt lighter. I decided to avoid the negativity at work, and focus on myself, and goodness. I can deal with the negative once I have recharged over the weekend, however this positivity would tide me over IF I were to have a confrontation. I know the evening held treasures of relaxation, rest, rejuvenation  and rejoicing, so I was ready to take on the rest of the day.


Namaste!

Meditation: Be present and Climb On!

Yesterday I climbed after a year. I do have a fear of heights, also I "self doubt" a lot regards to what I am capable of, I am also anxious about falling, although there is a trusty belayer ready to catch me; these afflictions in my mind, affect my body, and my climbing.

My first wall, I panicked the whole way up, forgetting to breathe, scared of falling. On my second climb, I heard my climbing teachers voice yell in my mind "breathe! breathe like you're having a baby." My breathing brought me to an utter awareness, and it was easier to climb.

My next climb, I almost gave up, but I took a few minutes to breathe, focus, meditating while hanging on a harness, 20 feet off the ground. Just collecting myself to here, now, me and my body. I let everyone else fade away, I let the world drop away, my breathing, my muscles, my heart all united in completing this small task of climbing to another 10 or 15 feet. It was a simple climb, but it seemed a gargantuan task, for a non-beginner, beginning to climb again. Those few minutes helped me gather some phenomenal energy to calm down and climb on. My focus was solely on me, and it was easier.

Why do I fret? Because I forget to be. I let fear take over, when all I need is me.

Meditation can help us immensely even though it maybe short... Maybe that's why they say when stressed, breathe and count to 10 when angry or flustered! So if you think about it there's been different types of meditation, through out the ages, cultures, places, and religions! The effects are always the same.

Breathe!

Om.

Spinning Meditation

Meditating still, but i switched it up.
Sometimes I sit still, sometimes I use music, sometimes I walk, sometimes I stand in a corner and breathe.
A few weeks ago my sister taught me how to spin Poi. The Mexican art of dancing with fire. I found it strangely meditative, yet requiring fitness, and relaxing. So now I spin while meditating and it helps me focus my energies, perhaps a lot like Tai Chi, which I did practice for a while as well (2 years of tai chi in the zoo, I kid you not. best experience ever).
Along with spinning playing music, (practicing guitar, or a different instrument is highly meditative too. This practice helps clear the mind while you focus on a task for a longer time.
So this has helped me focus. Which in turn has helped me regulate my emotional reactions. Which is strange, for I am usually very emotionally reactive.

Pick up your guitar, flute, or make some sock poi and meditate!

Music and Patience

I just started learning  how to play the Bass. This has me totally amped. Its like I have a bad case of the Music Bug. So it's been hard to sleep at night, like I keep thinking about practicing, and music, and how do i play it better, muscle memory. In itself, playing music has been so meditative in itself. I focus, get int he zone and I feel it deep down in my soul. However when I am not playing I enjoy the silence but it makes me antsy. I feel the need to be a part of the vibration the guitars emit. Feel it in my body, soul and mind. Maybe playing guitar is even spiritual to me, although it might just be some Weezer song!
I wonder if my middle name "Shruti" has anything to do with this craving for the constant need for music, the ebb and flow of music and silence alike. Hmm.

Perhaps we are supposed to feel like this about meditation and silence. Since I have been listening to a lot of Rock music, I have been craving silence, and acoustic guitar music. I think distortion may make a difference? Thoughts on this?

The difference between meditation and guitar playing is, one creative ripples and the other is about being still. However , Buddhists do use gongs, and chanting for meditation too! So I might be in a more modern track to meditation and music, harmony. Music (whatever genre) is such a huge part of my life, but so are my moments of silence. I think integrating both into the most unusual aspect of our lives is something, hmm... creative (?). In example using music for meditation, and silence in music. I was just at a concert and in the middle of the song they sounded like it ended, but came back for another round of chorus. It was amazing. I know its incomparable, but being at a concert is like being at a mass meditation where everyone is chanting OM. At least, to me the energy was comparable. Just food for thought, maybe next time you are at a concert you can change point of view and make it meditative.

I love silence and I love music!

Rock on and Breathe!

 In other news: I am 70+ days sober!

Meditate to self betterment

The first few days of meditation was great, I made it a priority, plus it was the weekend. My weekdays are ridiculously busy. So, just like Chris, I set my alarm for 5 minutes. During meditating I was distracted by thoughts of "ok when is this going to end cause I need to get on with it".

Chris and I discussed this, and realized we have to make meditation the PRIORITY, cause although it's sitting and doing nothing, it does do good to our physical health, mental well being etc. So This morning I meditated, setting the timer at 5 minutes. Sitting up straight was a challenge for my body was sore from climbing. This was not fun.

I closed my eyes, focused on breathing, and then I decided to make this meditation less shallow than the one's I've had all week. I focused on my breathing, my muscles, my pains, my body. I envisioned what I want my body to be like, and how I want to improve my performance in dance, climbing, running, tennis etc. I made that my goal. In psychology, there was study in which basketball players and the power of "imagining" (Meditating) was tested. So there were three groups - players that practiced shooting hoops, the players that did not practice, and lastly the players that envisioned (imagined) themselves shooting hoops and getting it through. The last group was told to focus on how they wanted to perform, feeling every movement from their toes to their finger tips to getting the ball through the hoop. this was done for 5 minutes everyday. The results showed that the group imagining their practice did as well as the group that actually did practice, if not better. Both did better than the group that did not practice. I think this meditation may help me in more ways that one.

Lastly, an observation from my week, where my meditation sessions were hackneyed due to the fact I was trying too hard, yet stressed about time and getting on with the rest of the day; I was less patient, and more annoyed, than when I did wholehearted meditations. I kept wondering why I was so antsy, annoyed, and experiencing "road rage", when the meditation should have helped calm me down and see the larger picture. Well meditation can only work when you do it wholeheartedly, not in a rush, and make it the priority. Do it for YOU, not for the sake of meditating.

A different kind of Meditation

Meditate to Live, Don't Live to Meditate.

Normally when I meditate I look at the clock and try to focus on the amount of time I want to meditate for. I usually go well over that but I am also usually fairly aware of how much time has passed.

Today, however, was a busy day and I only had time to meditate just before heading off to work. Naturally, I didn't want to "over-meditate" and be late for work. So I set a timer on my computer to beep when 10 minutes had gone by. The phone, which I thought was turned off, rang at precisely 5 minutes into my meditation. The timer on the computer was not running for some reason.

It was a good meditation and I would have liked it to go longer. But considering my timer wasn't set like I thought it was, and how close it was to the start of work it was fortunate that something snapped me out of it. And it made me remember that the whole point of meditation isn't to "get away" from it all. It's not a weekend retreat with healthy delicious food, chirping birds, and saunas. Meditation is more like combat training for life. If meditation can't help us when we are away from that little 5 minute bubble then it's really no better than any other form of escapism. Meditation is a discipline. It is a way to tame the monkey mind and be a stronger, smoother running form of ourself.

The next time I meditate I will try not to go into it with the mindset of shutting out the rest of my life. Instead, I will try looking at it as a deeper way to approach my life.

5 to 10 in 4 days!

Today is day four, I did ten minutes. It still wasn't easy but I did it.

Day one was Thursday (31st May). I started with 5 minutes; sitting upright to the best of my spinal cord's ability, breathing deeply (yoga breathing - aka abdominal breathing, inhale belly out, exhale contract the belly. Using the stomach/ab muscles we breathe). I focused on breathing, my thoughts wandered a bit and I brought them back to deep breathing. It was my lunch break, but I wasn't that hungry yet so I was able to focus. In the past I've had trouble focusing on an empty stomach. My watch was timing the meditation, and went off at 5 minutes, which seemed way too short, but felt great! However I had to stick to my tight work schedule.

Day two, Friday 1st June - I set my meditation time for 8 minutes, because I thought 5 was too short but wonderful. I started out with focusing on my breathing, and then I watched as my thoughts began to flow away from the breathing, then I would steer it back to the breathing. After a while of doing this, i thought it would be good to set an intention for the rest of the day, and what I wanted to send out to the universe, and what I would like to receive back. A lovely energy exchange essentially. 8 minutes was great, and refreshing, once again on my lunch break.

Day three, Saturday 2nd June - I set my clock to 10 minutes. It went serenely as I first focused on breathing and then listened, let thoughts flow, and memories of many childhood meditations fill me. Being a Saturday I added another 8 minutes after the 10. How is that meditation that I thought so difficult in the past was so easy now? The second 8 minutes was difficult cause although I was focusing on my breathing I was also distracted, and annoyed by my own tummy. I kept wanting to suck it in. My self image issues began emerging. I don't like my tummy. So I am meditating and the whole time grumbling in my mind via thoughts about how my tummy should not move with the breathing, this hindered my breathing, and thus my focus on breathing, and thought flow. I however decided to "let it go", and did. I began thinking about how I needed to pay rent and became anxious, then again I "let it go". Also these past three days, I would be meditating and feel an itch and be compelled to itch it, instead of using my head - "there's an itchy feeling. hmm. let it go." A thought does not always need to be followed by an action. Does it?

Day four, Sunday 3rd June - I paid my rent! Now I could meditate in peace. I just went running, did some yoga, and let my body reach homeostasis before sitting down to meditate. I sat outside on the balcony, and began meditating, always cross-legged (Indian style), back upright and my arms loosely stretched out over my legs and fingers in "chinmaya mudra". Today I was more annoyed with my tummy than ever, and my back was much fatigued (probably from running, situps and cobra pose). I toughed out ten minutes and ended the meditation with a startling sneeze from someone. Today it was hard to focus, but I made it a point to remind myself to get annoyed, watch the thought and let it go in the end. Resulting in me feeling over all calmer and patient.

Let's see what tomorrow holds!


OM!

Image taken from Gurumaa website, I believe that's the Chinmaya mudra.

The 5 Minute Meditation Project

A few days ago I had just finished the first meditation session I had done in a long time and was ready to start the day. Naturally that meant checking my email and seeing to my social networking addictions. My friend Pree was online, and after a bit of catching up I excitedly informed her,

Me: I meditated and exercised today! drinking tons of water too!!


Pree: i need to do all of the above.


Me: yeah. I really want to stay on the meditation thing.
I only did like 15 min and it made a big difference.
Ive had really bad anxiety the last few days. I can still feel it there but its much more controlled now.


Pree: hmm. i dont meditate at all.
like if i do its less than 5 minutes.


Me: 5 min is sufficient
and like any other discipline youll naturally do more and more over time if you just do it everyday.


I recalled the times that a week or so of daily meditation sessions helped me pull out of a slump or some existential crisis. I told Pree of one in particular time when I was so lost and in despair and meditation was pretty much the only positive thing I was doing for myself. After only a few weeks of meditating my outlook was changing, my posture improved, and I even dug up some long lost childhood memories.

Pree: wow
i need to!


Me: wanna make it a committment?
lets both meditate at least 5 minutes a day for the next 365 days


Pree: OK!
deal!
hmm we should make a blog about it


And thus began the 5 minute meditation project. For whatever reason, despite the consistently positive outcomes of meditation I never keep up the habit for more than a couple of weeks at a time. But if the past is any indicator the cumulative effect of a full year of regularly centering myself, and clearing the murky waters of my mind could very well be life changing.

As everyone accumulates inner junk throughout life, everyone can benefit from looking deep inside and recognizing and sorting out the mess. Is 5 minutes each day too much to give for even a chance of overcoming past hurts and self-defeating patterns? Of course not! So if you're reading this right now I hope you'll seriously consider joining in on this little experiment. This blog is mine and Pree's way of tracking and sharing the impact regular meditation has on our lives. If you choose to join in we would love to hear from you and to be able to share your experiences and insights with everyone. Or, you can spend that 5 minutes each day compulsively looking at the same old uninspiring nonsense online. Your call.

Happy Meditating everyone!